You Can Call Me "M" and Other Randomness

(the "D" comes in two years).

I still can't believe I'm halfway through my medical education. When I awoke this morning, I almost felt guilty for not studying. No memorizing the innumerable side effects of phenytoin, no constructing crazy acronyms or diagrams to remember which viruses have + RNA and which ones have - RNA, and no late night rendevous with Mr.Netter or Dr.Brown's notes.
I'm free.
No longer is my life quantified and organized by when the next pharmacology exam is or whether or not I know every minute detail about the pathology of alcoholism.

In less than a month, I'll change to being just another beeper-wearing, stethoscope-toting neophyte, lost somewhere in the halls of JCMC. Sometimes I still can't fathom the thought that I'm in medical school. That shy, little girl from Smyrna is going to be a doctor? Nah... You must be talking about the wrong person.

So it's good to be back in Smyrna for a few weeks. Good to pretend to be just a normal, average member of society, whatever that means. Good to not have to use the excuse of "I have to study" to miss social engagements and to engage in mindless activities like going to the movies without having the nagging thought of twenty more pages of notes to review before the next day. It's nice to have a change of pace from the frenzied life of a medical student to that of a student on summer break.

I have to say, every time I travel from Johnson City to Smyrna, I'm entertained by people's personal expression in the form of bumper stickers. My latest favorites are:

"My other car is a pair of boots"

"I love my wife"

"God is not a Republican....nor a Democrat"

Be careful of what you wish for. When I was a child, I told my parents that I really wanted a pony. I told my grandmother that she should give up some of her land to build a school so I could ride my (then) nonexistent pony to the (then) nonexistent school. It's strange how those seemingly important yet trite wishes have a way of coming true. My wish for a pony was fulfilled when I was fourteen, and now my wish for a school has been fulfilled. Unfortunately, my pony is now at the pony retirement home, and I'm too old to go to school.

It's funny how one can grow attached to a piece of land. It was never my land to begin with yet I was always allowed free reign to traverse its fields, as long as I didn't step on the new crop of corn or frighten the cows. It was my personal retreat, whether it be to run to grandma's house to receive comfort from a troubled day at school or time spent by the pond watching the reflection of the clouds on the water's surface. And now? All those memories are just memories. The fields with cattle and corn are a flattened plot of dusty earth. In place of corn stalks are steel beams bearing the mark of the structures of higher education for the next generation. And the lady who I told to give up her land so that I could ride my pony to school is no longer here to see the school for which she gave her land. But I suppose that's life. Change is inevitable but it's never easy to change. I think Alan Jackson aptly sums up my current sentiments:

"If my dear old dog never got old

If the family farm never got sold

Another bad joke never got told

That'd be alright"

So thanks for all your prayers, thoughts, support, blog readings, etc...It's been a crazy journey the past few years and I'm sure it will be another crazy two years to come. Vamos a ver!